I feel like everything is moving too slowly for me now. But, I am responsible for what I do with that kind of excess energy. I know what I can and should like to do.
I don’t feel especially connected to anything right now, and that’s a strangeness.
I don’t want to pay my bills.
I am the question and the problem. I am the answer and the solution. Also, and so confusingly also, the thing my brain can’t handle is: that I and We (You, included) are simultaneously multiplying and dividing). We are everyday getting farther apart and more connected.
Doubting myself is becoming OLD. I’d kinda rather fail (at least try) at this point than doubt myself (do nothing). Yes, I care a lot less about failing. I’m bored of my life. I need to try some things. Yes. I think I will become a tourist. YES!!!
This is where I would like to go. So, I guess I’m already on my way? Yes, i suppose it is the slow, somewhat boring beginning, as beginnings sometimes can be.
I would like to let this go, but to be able to treasure this memory as a surprise someday. To be able to attach it to the richness of living, even in a boring state it just buzzes with energy – living, eh? I want to keep it but I want to let it go at the same time.